I, as have many people, have experienced what it was like to put other people’s needs in front of my own. It felt good to be there for others and I could not get enough. I remember many times during my childhood and teenage years when I put others first, particularly in my family. I played out a role in helping others and as a result of this – I never knew who I was or even what I needed.
Through this realisation came a great deal of pain and angst. I just did not know what I needed and what my emotions were trying to tell me. I had never taken the time to put my own needs first, or to even listen to myself. I was never taught how. And as I say often, emotional regulation is a skill.
I went from realising my worth through other people’s validation, to knowing my own worth despite what other people say. This for me is one of the key definitions of true freedom. Trust freedom is knowing that you can feel good about yourself and appreciate your true worth, regardless of what other people do or say. Your worth is not determined by what others say.
I speak about this more on my YouTube channel.